When Was Your Last Mental Health Check-Up?
Imagine meeting someone who is 50 years old and finding out that they have never been to a dentist or a doctor. People would probably think that was unusual; maybe even a little concerning? We generally understand that regular check-ups are part of taking care of ourselves. Most people do not wait until they are in agony before they see a dentist. They have regular check-ups and book an appointment when they notice problems.
We take a similar approach with doctors. We have check-ups, monitor our blood pressure, get our eyes checked, and seek medical attention when something does not feel right. Whether it is a doctor or a dentist, we want to catch problems before they become serious. Why not take this approach with our mental and emotional health?
If someone has never seen a counsellor, we generally do not find that unusual at all. In fact, when someone is struggling but chooses not to seek support, they may be described as strong, independent, or resilient. Somehow, asking for help with mental health has become something that is expected only when things have become agonizing.
What if counselling could be a check-up?
A counselling check-up does not mean that something is wrong with you. It does not require a diagnosis, a crisis, or even a significant issue. It could simply be an opportunity to pause and ask yourself: “How am I doing?”
Life changes. Relationships change. Our responsibilities change. People experience loss, transitions, stress, successes, disappointments, and unexpected events. Sometimes they adapt easily, but sometimes they do not. Sometimes, they believe they are adapting when they are actually numbing themselves to cope with these experiences.
There can also be patterns in their lives that people have become so accustomed to that they no longer notice them. They may find themselves having the same arguments, reacting to situations in familiar ways, putting their own needs aside, or carrying stress that has gradually become part of everyday life.
A counselling check-up can provide an opportunity to step back and see themselves more clearly.
You do not have to wait until something is wrong
One of the benefits of seeing a dentist regularly is that a small issue can sometimes be identified before it becomes a much larger problem. The same principle can apply to mental and emotional well-being.
Talking with a counsellor when you are generally doing just okay may help you identify areas that could use some attention. Perhaps you are going through a transition and want to think about how you are navigating it. Perhaps you want to understand a relationship pattern. Perhaps you have been feeling more stressed than usual and want to explore what is contributing to it. Perhaps you simply want some time and space to reflect.
Counselling does not have to be about fixing something that is broken.
Strength does not mean doing everything alone
There is a persistent idea that being able to handle things on your own is a sign of strength. Independence can certainly be a strength, but so can resilience, resourcefulness, and the ability to cope with difficult circumstances. Asking for support can be a strength too.
We do not consider someone weak because they see a dentist. We do not assume that someone lacks resilience because they have a medical check-up. We recognize these things as ordinary ways of taking care of ourselves. We know that identifying medical issues early is the best method for reducing the chances of them becoming chronic and serious. Why is it not the same for mental health?
A counselling check-up can be a way of preventing issues from becoming chronic and unmanageable.
What would you talk about?
There is no standard checklist for a counselling check-up.
You might talk about how things are going in your relationships, how you are managing stress, a change that is affecting you, or something that has been on your mind. You might explore a pattern you would like to understand better or simply take some time to reflect on where you are in your life.
Sometimes, the most useful place to begin is simply with the question, “How am I doing?”
Maybe counselling needs to become less of a last resort when the struggles become overwhelming and more of a way to prevent those struggles.
After all, we do not wait until our teeth are rotting before we go to the dentist for the first time.
How long has it been since your last check-up?